Kung Fu Clam
by Ninjatana Warrior
Summary: Clam learns Kung Fu from Allan to prepare to face Gretchen after a misunderstanding that went wrong.(A bit of violence in the middle and a little bit of romance at the ending of the story) ClamXGretchen


**Kung Fu Clam**

**Note: Lots of action and some commentary. Enjoy!"**

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><p>At Acorn Flats, there is a game of tug-of-war taking place and the Beans consisting of the jelly trio, Edward, the dung beetles, the loons, the lemmings and Harold and the Squirrels consisting of Patsy, Nina, Gretchen, Almondine, Honey and Suzie are on the rope ready to begin. Their Scoutmasters and Slinkman are watching them and as for Miss Mucus, she's in charge of the activity.<p>

"Alright everyone listen up! This will be a "friendly" match between the putrid Bean scouts and the invincible Squirrel scouts!"

On the left, "I hope we won't lose again like before." said Edward. He turned behind and saw the jelly trio playing with the rope. "Again! Why is it that you guys keep messing things up?" Lazlo just answered: "We're not messing things up. We're just having fun pulling and waving the rope to make transverse and longitudinal waves."

"And what the heck are they suppose to be?" asked the pessimistic platypus. "Ask Lee!" answered Clam as he continued playing with the rope with his friends. "Ugh...I hate these useless losers." muttered Edward.

On the right, "Gretchen, do you still remember the technique used before?" asked Patsy. "Quiet! I still remember. Ok?" she replied as she prepared herself. As soon as everyone is ready, Miss Mucus blew the whistle and the pulling begins. First, the Beans pulled and then, the Squirrels pulled, then the Beans pulled again and opportunity awaits the Squirrels as they let go causing the Beans to stumble. The loon twins even broke their arms badly during the stumble. "NOW!" Gretchen got Patsy's message and grabbed the end of the rope. Well same as before, Clam was the only Bean scout still standing while holding onto the rope. Soon, the duo began to pull the rope onto each other.

"Longitudinal wave!" That is what Clam would say every time he pulls the rope making it harder for Gretchen until she unleashed a forceful pull sending Clam flying in the air while holding the rope.

"_I believe I can fly..."_ sang Clam as the next thing he knew it, he did a bit of acrobatics and landed on Gretchen with his feet. "PSH" After that, he apologized and went to his friends not knowing that from behind...

"Are you okay Gretchen?" asked Patsy. All she could sputter is, "He...he...just..."

"He just what? Gave you a "shock" of your life?" teased Nina. Then, she and Patsy giggled and snickered over the joke until...

"HE JUST KICKED ME!" flared Gretchen. She stood up and dashed towards Clam clenching her fists. "Watch out CLAM!" yelled Raj when he saw her. Clam turned and dodged all of the punching, kicking, tail swings from a hot tempered alligator. All the scouts then cheered the fighting until Miss Mucus showed up and yelled at everybody so loud that she killed a few birds and shattered the windows by accident. That, is as loud as what happened before at the picnic.(I bet you all remember that episode. Right?)

"Alright what's the meaning of this?" she asked. "Clam purposely kicked me!" yelled Gretchen. "But he just..." "Shut up! pink elephant!" ordered Miss Mucus. "I don't care what's your business to the both of you but if you wanna settle your scores, I suggest 3 days from now until the day comes when you 2 will be at Madison Squirrel Garden." Now that she's done, everyone left to do their own things leaving the jelly trio and Patsy and Nina.

"What does she mean?" asked Raj.

"She means that Clam and Gretchen are going to have a showdown against each other." answered Nina.

"This looks bad for Clam." said a worried Lazlo as Clam is shivering with fear over what Nina said.

Putting her hand on his shoulder, "Well Lazlo, let's hope he can survive and make it out of the fight alive_._" said Patsy.

"I hope so..." replied Lazlo.

"Well got to go, I got dance practice with Amber and Suzie."

"Gee Patsy, I didn't know you can dance."

"Well recently, the 3 of us formed a dance group called the "Dancing Squirrels". Pretty cool right Lazlo?"

"Yeah Patsy. Well I also got to go as me and Raj need to find a way to help Clam in his dilemma and I know one Bean scout who can provide assistance to our cause."

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><p><strong>So later...<strong>

"Let me get this straight Lazlo, Clam landed on Gretchen with his feet making her think that he kicked her literally thus she went on a rampage trying to fight him until Miss Mucus broke it up and suggested a showdown between them in 3 days is it?"

"That's right Allan. Right now Clam is shivering in fear of it." True, the albino pygmy rhino is shaking(Literally the Harlem Shake) uncontrollably. he even kept saying: "Clam don't want to fight Gretchen!" per 5 minutes. Seeing this, "Okay, let's first do this. William!" The grey wolf popped his head up from the basement for the jelly trio are in the BRAWL gang's cabin(I somehow don't know what to name their cabin from so you have to be patient about it). "Take Clam to your "Torture Area" and report to me about his statistics." With obedience, William motioned Clam to the basement and after 5 minutes, they came out with William holding a piece of paper as he approached Allan and showed it to him. Lazlo and Raj even noticed that their faces looked greatly stunned as they discussed about it quietly. After that, "Alright Lazlo I'll help on one condition that Clam stays with me for the 3 days. Okay?" Lazlo and Raj looked surprised. "But why do you want Clam to stay with you?" asked Raj. Allan gave him the paper and he and Lazlo looked through in amaze. "Who wouldn't have thought that Clam could weightlift 200 pounds a 100 times in a minute." Raj whispered to Lazlo in which he agreed by turning to Allan and he said: "Well I don't know what will happen to Clam but I trust you as a friend. So we'll take it." Allan nodded in approval and as for Clam, he's still shaking. Oh for Pete's sake, somebody shake him down!

Clam doesn't know what Allan had in store for him as the duo are in the forest walking for a while until they reached an open spot. "So you will be fighting Gretchen in 3 days eh?" said Allan. Still, "Clam don't want to fight Gretchen!" was his reply. "I know, and I will teach you how to in a more specific and easy way within 3 days and soon, you will be ready to face the music." With that, Allan took out a book and showed it to Clam. It's called "The art of Kung Fu". "This is where you will master the ways of the warrior, the art of self-defence and soon, you will achieve total victory on the day of the fight. I ask you today, will you choose to accept the teachings or..." Easily, Clam who was gazing at the book immediately declared: "Kung Fu! Clam wants to learn!" That was a quick answer. Surprising eh?

Training begins for Clam as he first did some warm-up exercises before executing different punching and kicking techniques taught by Allan. He then proceeded to teach him the different animal fighting styles like the eagle claw style, dragon style, tiger claw style and many more...after half an hour's rest, Allan made Clam break some wood with his hands by chopping them. However, Clam wasn't strong enough. "Focus is the key to success." Allan taught Clam. Upon hearing that, Clam focused hard and "SMASH!" the piece of wood was chopped. Allan smiled about it as Clam spent the next hour slicing pieces of wood and even stone. After that, Clam learnt to block attacks although it gets harder when Allan does the attacking swiftly and Clam could not cope and catch up with his speed. "One must know that the best way to avoid an attack is to avoid an attack." Clam got the message and mastered avoiding attacks swiftly. Finally, Clam at first had trouble predicting the incoming swinging wooden cylinders tied with ropes onto the branches of the trees used for Clam to block with one finger without using his physical senses until Allan taught him. "Use your instincts. Focus your strength into one point and in doing so, you can accomplish anything." then, he demonstrated it by closing his eyes and after a few seconds, he crushed a falling leaf into bits without opening his eyes. Clam upon seeing and hearing it took a deep breath, closed his eyes and focused, the next thing Allan knew it, he twisted his body behind and blocked the wooden cylinder even breaking it into splinters, then, he did the same thing likewise to the other wooden cylinders reducing them to splinters. Seeing this made Allan pleased.

After all that rigorous Kung Fu training, they decided to call it a day and head back to camp. On their way, Clam saw Allan clean his katana and he noticed the sheath has a unique design of a blue dragon with streaks of lightning bolts while they are resting their aching feet together. "Blue Dragon sword!" he exclaimed. "Good guess Clam. It's called the Blue Dragon Blade and it's a prize from winning a Kung Fu tournament in Japan a few years ago." Allan explained. "Remember this Clam, When you do Kung Fu, you must have respect, honour and trust and also, your strength is not on the outside but on the inside. You understand?" Clam nodded as he now feels stronger and ready for the upcoming fight but still, he has a lot to learn for the remaining time left until the day comes. "One more thing, keep it as a secret ok?" Clam nodded as he can't wait for the day to come...

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><p><strong>On the day of the fight...<strong>

After 3 days of training, Clam is fully prepared as he and Allan peeped a bit. Outside, Beans and Squirrel Scouts are seated according to gender and at the centre of the garden is a boxing ring. Also, they saw Recon and Lee preparing the audio system and Edward and the dung beetles setting up a booth for campers to bet money on the competitors. "Ready?" asked Allan. Clam nodded and then Allan continued, "Alright Clam, Ikuzo!"(which means "let's go!") They came out and the boys cheered on their arrival as they entered the ring. There Gretchen who was with Miss Mucus was waiting for them and she's also ready as she's wearing her boxing attire. "Prepare to meet your doom! Clam! I spent 3 days with Miss Mucus working out and I assure you that you're going down!" Clam just ignored her and removed his cloak he was wearing the whole time(Also, Allan gave him one of his as a gift for his hard work in training) revealing a karate suit with a black belt. All were mesmerized at Clam's new outfit even Gretchen. "Are you stupid or what? This isn't a-", "Watch it! Did Miss Mucus ever stated what kind of showdown will it be?" asked Allan. That silenced her.(Serves her right!)

At the booth, "Oh great! I "bet" that we're gonna lose our money to those pathetic girls!" said Edward as from behind, the dung beetles are counting the money bet on the competitors by the campers. "we're rich! r-i-c-h-e rich!" they chanted. "Guys, the word "rich" does not have an "e" at the end and we're seriously not rich." explained Edward in a dry tone until he collected money from Suzie in which he also complimented her that she smells like the sunflowers in their field but the result is a black eye. Ouch.

At the bleachers, "Lazlo, How come Clam is wearing a karate outfit with a black belt?", "I'm not sure Raj,but what is Allan's game with Clam since we made a deal that he stays with him and now this is the result?" Watching from the distance, Slinkman climbed into the ring as the ring announcer while Lumpus lazily supervise Recon and Lee who are commentators of the match.

"And now, the moment you all had been waiting for, the showdown between on our right is Gretchen." Recon commentated. The boys jeered and the girls cheered.  
>"And on our left is Clam." continued Recon. Same thing but opposite the gender.<p>

Before the first match, "Alright, I want a nice, clean and fair fight from the both of you." reminded Slinkman. "Now, shake hands." Instead, Clam bowed to Gretchen making her want to sandwich him on the ring. "Initiate." commentated Lee. And so it begins!

1st round

Gretchen charged and tried to punch Clam but he dodged swiftly like before in his training. "See how swift and graceful Clam dodged those punching from Gretchen who can't cope with his speed." described Lee. While dodging, Clam also blocked her attacks as quick as lightning. "Swift moves from Clam! How in the world is he able to perform such reflexes?" exclaimed Recon. Seeing this, "Go for it Clam!" Raj cheered out loud. Clam in the middle of blocking turned and waved at him. Crap! Big Mistake! "Just where you're looking at? I'm your opponent!" Oops, Clam turned and "POW!" he was soundly knocked out big time ending the first match. The girls cheered and the boys are sullen. Miss Mucus even laughed with satisfaction. Seeing this, "Concentrate Clam. Remember what I taught you?" Allan recapped as he gave Clam a drink and a massage(which he's good at). Instantly, flashbacks of their 3 day's training, the lessons, the moves and the techniques all appeared in Clam's mind. He then crushed the bottle and stood up ready to battle. As for the crushed bottle, he threw it away in which it hit Lumpus(who was trying to get closer to Jane Doe) and he fell off the commentary area and broke his antlers on the ground as the bottle landed on him and bounced into a nearby recycling bin.

2nd round

Gretchen used the same tactics but a well-focused Clam this time took care of it blocking her punching, kicking and tail lashes. "Clam's on her tail!" Recon commentated in excitement. "But he executed acrobatics in the air perfectly! Can Gretchen claim her victory regardless of the difficulty level which is defined as..." Before he can continue, Recon stuffed a dirty sock in his mouth making him choke badly. Back at the ring, Clam finally made his move by doing karate chops and spinning kicks on Gretchen hitting certain parts of her body accurately. Miss Mucus yelled at her to finish him off instantly but she felt distracted and yelled at her back until, "Hey!" Gretchen turned and, "Clam's your opponent!" soon enough, Clam who is standing way too close in front of her flicked her and she fell defeated instantly. The Squirrels were thunderstruck over the defeat and the Beans were mesmerized over the victory. Clam then approached Allan who smiled saying: "Glad you mastered the _tuite_ technique which allows the weak to overcome the strong." He then gave him another bottle and he drank it all up in one gulp throwing it away in which it hit Lumpus(who just got up from just now)again and he fell down clutching his crotch while the bottle landed in the same bin. Allan laughed a bit over his misfortune then continued, "You've come this far Clam and I must say I'm proud to train you in the ways of Kung Fu." Clam bowed down in return respecting him and saying 3 words "Honour and Trust" a few times to his "Sensei".(Should I really describe my OC to be well-disciplined or what?) At the other side, "I'm gonna crush him...crush him...for good!" Gretchen declared under her lips while breathing heavily. As she drank some water, she spat some of it on the dung beetles(who are passing by) wetting their shorts.

"Uh Chip, I think we've got a major problem."  
>"Really? How bad is it Skip"<br>"So bad it reaches our underwear."  
>"Oh, now that is bad."<br>"I know right?"

Final round

"The fighters will give everything they've got. Right Lee?"  
>"Indeed Recon, they are tied and would do anything to gain the final win! Now on with the match!"<p>

Alright let's go people! The final round began when Gretchen swatted Clam with her tail but he retaliated with a low sweep that kicked her down. Then, she tried to punch him but he blocked it multiple times until she knocked his feet down. However, he stood up and performed the dragon punch attack by punching her in the air and punching her down. "This fight is getting intense and uglier." said Raj. "And how is Clam able to do all these fighting styles so easily?" added Samson. The fight went on with punches, kicks, swats, chops and blocks all over the place(Oh my I feel like it's getting out of hand as I continue writing all the action packed stuff in it!) Bruised are they after using all their energy leading them to tiredness and perhaps a bit of injury. "What? They stopped!" Recon exclaimed. "Indeed my friend, using all of their energy leads to stress, tiredness, a bit of injury and many more which can be classified as symptoms which are defined as hey! Oof!" Stuffing another dirty sock in his mouth, "And back to the battle, is it over for both fighters?" Answer? No one knows not even you until..."BOOM!" Everybody gasped at the fact that they fell together and yeah, They are also not twitching a single bit. "CLAM!" Lazlo and Raj yelled as they ran and jumped into the ring to check their best friend. "CLAM! Speak to us!" Lazlo begged as he grabbed Clam and checked his pulse. "He's alive but slightly wounded." Allan explained. "But is he going to be alright?" asked Raj. "Worry not a single you must. I must say, a great job in the ring he did with honour and trust." praised Allan with a smile.

At the booth because of what happened at the ring, "Hey Edward, we want our money back!" the loon twins called out. "Don't forget me Edward, you owe me something "valuable". Samson called out. As more comments were taking place, "Hey guys, let's get out of here right now!", "Uh Edward? there is no way out of us." said Chip. "But there is a way in for them. LOOK OUT!" Skips shrieked with horror as all the campers made their move and it became a very ugly scene(or perhaps a riot?) for Pinto Cabin and it lasted until...Oh never mind about it! let's just move onto the next scene shall we?...

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><p><strong>Later on...<strong>

"Is he awake?"

"I don't know. He seems to be unconscious during the match."

"Patience, he'll recover after all that action he had just now."

"By the way, the way he fought was amazing! Where did he learn that from?"

The murmurings or voices filled with angst(over the competitors) and excitement(over the fight) went on as the eyes opened up bit by bit until a figure woke up and found himself in Nurse Leslie's clinic(and also that pink shark was ranked Nursemaster in that episode. Remember?) "Both of them suffered little damage of bruises but they'll be fine by tomorrow." assured Nurse Leslie. He then wheeled to get some coffee.(As we also know that sharks cannot walk on land, that's why the pink shark uses a wheeling stool to move him around and even though he's ranked Nursemaster, people still address him as Nurse Leslie. Isn't it a bit ironic or what?) Looking around, he saw friendly faces surrounding him. "So Clam, you okay?" asked Lazlo. "Clam's fine but...where's Gretchen?", "Look to your right." answered Nina. There beside him was Gretchen in the same condition but needs bed rest and in the southeast of Clam is Lumpus wrapped up like a mummy and in front of him are Pinto Cabin with casts on their arms and legs. "After the fight,we found Lumpus in a daze, so we brought him here too." explained Lazlo. "Furthermore, he's in critical condition so he will have a longer wait than you guys." added Patsy. "Also, the incident that took place just now resulted into broken injuries for Edward and Dung Beetles." said Raj. "Furthermore, every camper got their money back including us." added Nina as she checked her purse to ensure that the amount was right until Nurse Leslie wheeled in saying: "Alright kids, you all better head back to camp right now and by tomorrow morning you'll see them in perfect condition." With obedience, they complied until Raj who was drinking a can of soda the whole time threw it away and it landed on the pedal of Lumpus' bed and into the bin. Unexpectedly, the bed shot him out of the clinic(the door was also open when the scouts left) and he got a good splash along with some indignant lake inhabitants. Ouch.

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><p><strong>The next morning...<strong>

The door in his office opened up revealing 2 scouts fully recovered as they left the office. "Uh Clam." Clam turned to Gretchen who was somehow... "I'm sorry about yesterday." she apologized and also added: "By the way, where did you learn those close combat moves from?" Clam just answered: "Secret!" That confused her until he smiled asking: "Want a warm hug?" Gretchen at first growled but paused for a moment. Then, she smiled and instead and unexpectedly pecked him on the face that went on for some time until their friends arrived to check on them and what they saw was a marvellous sight when they arrived. While this was going on, nearby, Slinkman and Nurse Leslie managed to get Lumpus(who is full of bites and horrible markings) out of the lake. Boy, he's worst than a maggot in this state of condition. Ouch again.

THE END


End file.
